My favorite!

9 Month Portraits

These were my sneak peaks from Sam's photo shoot yesterday. I love every. single. one. of. them.

It's Official

Starting Monday, this guy has a FABULOUS full-time nanny. It's the childcare situation of my dreams. Now I can go to work in peace. Hallelujah!

"It was fun!" he says.

Other than the small skirmish this morning regarding whether or not someone would accompany the kindergartner into his classroom, all went well. He didn't want me to walk in with him, but I insisted. Once we got there, he asked me to stay a few minutes. I stayed until he sneezed snot everywhere and Miss Lash didn't have any tissues out yet. See ya. Wouldn't wanna be ya. Got in the car and cried all the way home.

The length of her skirt was more appropriate today.

At pick-up time, there was a line of cars like you have never seen. I sat for 45 minutes waiting my turn. When he got in the car, he was SO excited. Immediately he said, "Mom! It was FUN! Como te llamas?"

"Me llamo Kim," I replied.

He stared. He was impressed, I could tell.

"Como te llamas?" I asked

"Me llamo John."

Yay.

Kindergarten

Yesterday, John said, "I don't think kindergarten is my thing."  Of course, he hasn't started yet.  Tomorrow is the big day.

Tonight, we went to meet his teacher, Miss Lash.  It was my first time at his school.  We were going to send him to our neighborhood school, but found out mid-summer that our lottery number was drawn for a Spanish immersion program.  So, while the boys had gone to check it out, I had yet to lay eyes on the place.

As we entered the classroom, I had a bit of trouble finding Miss Lash. Brian finally had to point. She's about 25, tall, thin, hair down to her waist. Ostentatious eyelashes, appropriately, considering her name. We waited our turn to greet her while I fretted about what to write on the "Introduce Your Child To Me!" form we were asked to complete. I sized her up.  Miss Lash is stunning. She is fashionable and well spoken and friendly.  She had lots of fun stuff up on the walls.  The room was well organized and bright.  But her skirt was WAY too short. 

I really thought I'd be OK with this whole kindergarten thing. People kept asking me, morosely: "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine," I'd say, confused. Why are they asking me this?

Well, I figured it out tonight as I hyperventilated in the parked car while the boys ran back in with the supplies.  Which, by the way, totalled nearly $100 and included 20 glue sticks and some watercolors you can only find at Michael's.

When we got home, John was even more excited and I was trying to fake it.  I thought maybe reading him a story would help me calm down.  He wanted Captain Underpants and Frankenfart vs. The Bionic Barf Bunnies from Diarrhealand.  It's not on the kindergarten-readiness book list they gave us, but I humored him, read the book, and kissed him goodnight.

And then I came to the dining room to re-read Miss Lash's introductory essay, which she printed on kindergarten stationery.  It has four paragraphs.  In the first paragraph, I was mostly concerned about this statement, "During the two years between my undergraduate and graduate work, I moved to New York City and wokred in the fashion industry in marketing and event planning." 

I became even more frazzled by the second paragraph, which started out, "While this is my first year teaching ..." 

Then I noted that she's studied Spanish since fourth grade and recently completed an immersion program in Costa Rica after completing her master's in elementary education from Vanderbilt.  I started to feel better. 

I kept reading and reading all the way down to the fourth paragraph.  You know what I was looking for, right?  Surely dear reader, you know by now that I read everything with a red pen within arm's reach. 

There was nothing.  Not one single comma mistake ... no typos ... zero instances of weird word choice or grammar ... nothing wrong ... not even anything awkward ... at all.  There were a few too many exclamation points in my opinion, but some might say that's appropriate for a kindergarten teacher.  Unlike her skirt.

Maybe I'll be able to sleep tonight after all. 

His Miss America Wave

The Green Team

Last Wednesday, John passed into Station 7, which means he qualifies for the first level of swim team. Apparently it was quite a scene ... Brian jumping up and down screaming on the bleachers and John doing something similar in the water, out of the water, and then later with two lollipops hanging out of his mouth. It's been a long, hard haul for us with swimming lessons, but I think the following email snippet from his coach says it all:

Your boy put on quite a show at his last lesson -- graduating to Station 7! He
looks terrific and his confidence is at an all-time high. We are very proud of
John. I am attaching information and registration materials on the NAC beginner
swim team group -- the "Green Group." John is definitely ready for this next
step in his swimming career and I encourage you to give it a try this
fall.

Career. She said he has a swimming "career." Olympics 2020, here. we. come.

Milwaukee Fam

Where's Kim in these pictures, you might ask.

Well, for most of the time, I was stuck in Kansas City, but the highlights of my own, personal journey to Milwaukee include flying out of Nashville TWICE, overnighting in Platte City, Missouri, flying into Chicago and taking a cab, pumping 7 times in public restrooms, and somehow becoming a personal travel companion for a 300 pound mentally handicapped man, with whom I struck up a lovely friendship.

Total trip time for Kim: 31 hours

Other stats:  3 planes, 3 cars, 1 train, 30 ounces of milk

Total time in Milwaukee:  33 hours

Milwaukee John

Milwaukee Sam

The famous "hitch crawl" -- here he is in action with the push leg.















Apparently, he was naked a lot.