Redefining the term "Vacation"

Maybe I shouldn't write this now. Maybe I should just wait until all my agita blows over and I've done some yoga and had some downtime. Maybe it's never appropriate to question the term "vacation" when you are one of the few people on the planet earth who are lucky enough to take one every year. Or maybe it's inappropriate because YOUR TEESTER IS IN LABOR AS YOU WRITE AND YOU CAN HARDLY STAND IT AND THEY STARTED PITOCIN ABOUT 45 MINUTES AGO AND HOW IN THE WORLD WILL YOU EVER BE ABLE TO GET ANY SLEEP?

Or maybe you could just go ahead and do what you know you're going to do, which is post a bunch of pictures which make it LOOK as if FUN WAS HAD when in actuality there was a lot of talk about finding nice fulltime daycares and/or divorce lawyers.

Just kidding about the divorce lawyers.

We just returned from a "vacation" to Seattle, Whidbey Island, & San Juan Island, Washington. We learned a lot on this vacation, including, but not limited to the following top ten "nevers," followed by the top ten "alwayses":

1. Never take a toddler on a flight that is more than 2-3 hours.
2. Never take a toddler WEST into a different time zone.
3. Never take a toddler to an amusement park where some of the rides are closed because inevitably he will want to ride ONLY the ones that are closed.
4. Never be mean to your fellow air passengers just because they are making "they should've medicated him" comments under their breath.
5. Never forget Benadryl.
6. Never expect to "get lucky" and see Orcas in the off-season.
7. Never allow even a five-minute nap in the car. NEVER.
8. Never underestimate the power of tantrums at amusement parks.
9. Never assume that a nap will occur just because the flight was carefully planned during normal napping hours.
10. Never, under ANY circumstances, expect a toddler to go anywhere NEAR the swimming pool that played such a huge role in hotel selection. And p.s., never force a toddler into the pool without checking for a poopy diaper first.

And now, the "alwayses":

1. Always take a nebulizer, tweezers, peroxide, Q-tips, Neosporin, a ball, a truck/car, carpet cleaner, a headlight, and some valium.
2. Always get a suite with a big, heavy door disconnecting the rooms.
3. Always have a Gerber toddler meal on hand since chocolate pudding won't ever last the entire 4.5 hours on a plane ride cross-country.
4. Always take a stroller just in case you happen to want to walk 2.5 miles from your hotel to Chinatown. And back.
5. Always order "fishballs in curry sauce" while in Chinatown. Those circular, rubbery skewered creatures may be the only thing your toddler will eat.
6. Always work in an overnight visit with some relatives along the way. And if they offer a longer stay at their house (where there is scrumptious food, gorgeous views, a garbage truck pickup, and the potential for free babysitting), then by all means TAKE THEM UP ON THE OFFER instead of travelling to another island where everything is closed during the off season and there are no orcas anyway.
7. Always complain if your room doesn't have a tub (only a shower), because you might get upgraded to a suite with a private entrance and balcony, kitchenette, and jacuzzi tub.
8. Always visit anything called "Children's Museum" (or something similar) a few blocks from your hotel; don't assume that it is for older kids and miss your opportunity to drop off your toddler there while you head up to the top of the space needle to enjoy a $25 burger.
9. Always take off your toddler's shoes BEFORE he gets into the rental car. Especially after he has walked in freshly-laid blacktop.
10. Always allow your toddler to take rides on automatic wheelchairs with centenarians even if the centenarian's daughter is saying, "Daddy, listen to me. Do not take that child on a ride. Listen to me! We are late for your appointment!"
11. A bonus: ALWAYS choose restaurants according to the following criteria: (1) outdoor seating; (2) adjacent to construction sites.

It definitely could've been better. Or WORSE. So of course I'm not complaining or anything like that. I never complain.

Here are some pictures:

Above: The relatives' house (thanks Aunt D & Uncle K!).

We highly recommend the Washington State Ferry systems ... if not for the spectacular views, then at least for their addictive video games:

We also recommend this trail:

It goes up that grassy hillside next to the evergreen forest and then back down to a trail on the beach. There are views like this:

Yep, that's a bald eagle. And this:

Yep, that's a snow-covered Canadian mountain range in the background.

Did you notice the whales?

Shocking. We didn't either.

Not that it's important or anything, since there are plenty of construction sites in the Pacific Northwest:

I did have some cool travel companions though:

I need a vacation.

Not a "vacation." A vacation. More pictures are available. Just clicky click on one of those gems above.